Implantation bleeding?

Ah the trials of TTC! So here I am once again obsessively trawling the web, chat forums, blogs, looking for anything I can find to help me determine what’s going on with my unpredictable reproductive system today.

Having returned last week from a much-needed vacation in the sun, where we took that old well-meaning  advice to heart..go have a holiday, relax and it will happen for you (!) I’ve been hoping against hope that we may have brought a permanent souvenir back with us. My period is due end of this week but this morning I started spotting. So is this the start of an early period or is it possibly implantation bleeding, which according to the material I’ve been reading can occur 6-12 days post ovulation?

Things are further complicated by the fact that I am due to start Gonal F (FSH stimulator) injections this cycle in preparation for IUI (Intrauterine Insemination) treatment. I had been meaning to update the blog with that information but then we went on holiday and I had some thinking to do about how I feel about taking this next step.

I have mixed feelings about it…initially I was excited as I felt at last someone expert is taking our fertility issues in hand. I felt as if a weight had been taken off our shoulders. I was really nervous beforehand, afraid they’d deliver some devastating news.. but all our tests were fine..except that my progesterone levels are low but they can work on that. I wasn’t expecting to start on treatment straight away but the consultant reccommended IUI for our next cycle.

Afterwards  I felt a little overwhelmed – I think I always hoped that we’d get pregnant without intervention, so I am just trying to adjust to this new step now. I am torn between excitement, relief, apprehension and fear. How will I cope with this new rollercoaster of fertility treatment which I know can take its toll on couples? And here I am once more determine if this an early period or am I really pregnant?  Will I be starting fertility treatment this week or celebrating a pregnancy? Like I say…the trials of TTC!!!